We're at this stage in life where we reminisce too much of our near past, worry too much about our near future, are
too clueless about everything that can, will, may happen to us, think we know alot, think we don't know anything,
am confident about the wrong things, take pride in wasting time away, want too much but want to do too little.
Ohwell.
Thursday, May 15, 2008
Locus of |z|=2 is a circle
I hoped I never had to Believe you were real.
Took a joyride through Maths. Nothing is really real, not even the real component of complex numbers. Everything is just imaginary. Locus, Maclaurin's, e to the power of y, h(x), pi plane intersecting at right angles with the plane y=x, forming 4-coded words from DISTRIBUTION, the number of patrons at the IT fair, them purchasing something, guy who takes mean of 15 minutes to drive to work and get stuck at 4 traffic lights, prove landa=2, show this this this this and more.
I did okay. Passed it, if nothing goes really wrong. No, if nothing goes wrong, I'll get full marks. Which is implausible (there's actually such a word? Wonder what it means).
Sometimes I think I lack meaning in life. How is proving landa=2 going to get me anywhere.
Where am I heading anyway.
Does that even matter.
Am I really spending my time. I aren't getting anything in exchange, then that's not spending already, it's wasting. How valuable is the cert going to be. How much am I going to value it. Is it going to be another, oh so I did well yay and then what? Then I end up somewhere I don't want to be, not entirely confused but still, not doing anything about it.
I think I'm whining because I didn't fulfill what I came NJ for. Yep, the red tie, what else.
What else.
I feel void. Empty because suddenly you just sit and think and realise nothing really matters. Grades matter, really? They do, okay they do. They matter because that's what everyone values. They get you somewhere, I don't know where, but they are supposed to get you somewhere. And you can't stay hanging midway, nowhere, because then you won't survive. So it's important that you get somewhere, therefore grades matter.
But I don't know where somewhere is. It's like nowhere to me.
Realistically, I probably need some career counselorwho sits in the Career Guidance room and get paid referring you to 2004 university reference books to tell me where I should be heading. Not-so-realistically, I probably just need some sleep, wake up tomorrow and forget about trying to find some non-existent goals so I can just go about doing what we do everyday, just like everyone else.
That's the stupid problem of growing up. You startthinking worrying about the future. And secretly hoping it never comes.
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Can I now use that as an excuse to not study for Chemistry. Nothing really matters you know.
Oh well. I tried. (Truthfully, I swear I tried.) But the things that went in came out. Those that stayed left for better places soon after. Those that are still in there now probably aren't even Chemistry. Those that stayed and ARE Chemistry are what you me, and the monkey that doesn't take Chemistry knows. Like metals can conduct electricity because they have delocalised electrons. And they're malleable, and uh shiny, and uhh pretty, and uhhh we use aluminum to make cars. Yea, things like that.
Oh. And I know you use KMnO4 to oxidise. Does that count for something :D
Man. I'm hopeless.
-----------------------------------------
HongjiemeixXxXxXxXxX tried inspiring me just now by saying "it's better to spend 3hrs studying now than to waste 3hrs tomorrow".
Barney inspiring. Worked barnies for me.
I won't waste 3hrs tomorrow. The paper will only take 2 minutes. HAHA. :(
If I pass Chem I'll tie curtains round my head and run around in Little India.
Dinner, teevee, bed.
I'm so incorrigible. Don't learn from me. (Not like there's anything to learn huh.)
Bye 4000 goldfishes.
6:03:00 PM because I say so
Took a joyride through Maths. Nothing is really real, not even the real component of complex numbers. Everything is just imaginary. Locus, Maclaurin's, e to the power of y, h(x), pi plane intersecting at right angles with the plane y=x, forming 4-coded words from DISTRIBUTION, the number of patrons at the IT fair, them purchasing something, guy who takes mean of 15 minutes to drive to work and get stuck at 4 traffic lights, prove landa=2, show this this this this and more.
I did okay. Passed it, if nothing goes really wrong. No, if nothing goes wrong, I'll get full marks. Which is implausible (there's actually such a word? Wonder what it means).
Sometimes I think I lack meaning in life. How is proving landa=2 going to get me anywhere.
Where am I heading anyway.
Does that even matter.
Am I really spending my time. I aren't getting anything in exchange, then that's not spending already, it's wasting. How valuable is the cert going to be. How much am I going to value it. Is it going to be another, oh so I did well yay and then what? Then I end up somewhere I don't want to be, not entirely confused but still, not doing anything about it.
I think I'm whining because I didn't fulfill what I came NJ for. Yep, the red tie, what else.
What else.
I feel void. Empty because suddenly you just sit and think and realise nothing really matters. Grades matter, really? They do, okay they do. They matter because that's what everyone values. They get you somewhere, I don't know where, but they are supposed to get you somewhere. And you can't stay hanging midway, nowhere, because then you won't survive. So it's important that you get somewhere, therefore grades matter.
But I don't know where somewhere is. It's like nowhere to me.
Realistically, I probably need some career counselor
That's the stupid problem of growing up. You start
-----------------------------------------
Can I now use that as an excuse to not study for Chemistry. Nothing really matters you know.
Oh well. I tried. (Truthfully, I swear I tried.) But the things that went in came out. Those that stayed left for better places soon after. Those that are still in there now probably aren't even Chemistry. Those that stayed and ARE Chemistry are what you me, and the monkey that doesn't take Chemistry knows. Like metals can conduct electricity because they have delocalised electrons. And they're malleable, and uh shiny, and uhh pretty, and uhhh we use aluminum to make cars. Yea, things like that.
Oh. And I know you use KMnO4 to oxidise. Does that count for something :D
Man. I'm hopeless.
-----------------------------------------
HongjiemeixXxXxXxXxX tried inspiring me just now by saying "it's better to spend 3hrs studying now than to waste 3hrs tomorrow".
Barney inspiring. Worked barnies for me.
I won't waste 3hrs tomorrow. The paper will only take 2 minutes. HAHA. :(
If I pass Chem I'll tie curtains round my head and run around in Little India.
Dinner, teevee, bed.
I'm so incorrigible. Don't learn from me. (Not like there's anything to learn huh.)
Bye 4000 goldfishes.
6:03:00 PM because I say so