We're at this stage in life where we reminisce too much of our near past, worry too much about our near future, are
too clueless about everything that can, will, may happen to us, think we know alot, think we don't know anything,
am confident about the wrong things, take pride in wasting time away, want too much but want to do too little.
Ohwell.
Sunday, September 21, 2008
A B C D or E
For some reason, I felt like I've kind of wasted two years in NJ. It feels like, the grass is very very very very very very very very much greener, tastier, more nutritious etc etc on the other side(s).
I don't know why, the nearer we get to graduating (hopefully), the emptier I feel. It's like I don't know what I'm going to school for anymore.
But the scary thing is, I know if I had another chance, to re-choose back at the age of 16, I'll still choose this 'dream school' of bright red tie and Bukit Timah. Even if I already know 961 takes about 6 eons to arrive, even if I'm already familiar with the dread when I miss a 961, or the barney jams at Kranji when Mas Salamat just went missing. Or even if I already know I will only get to wear the bright red tie once a year. I think I'll still end up in NJ.
Maybe it's because I won't be brave enough to toy with something new and totally unfamiliar.
Or maybe, there are some things about NJ that I won't want to forgo. People, mostly. (Feels weird saying mostly when the quantity isn't really alot. But still, it's mostly. Get it?)
It's not like I feel I'll be happier in JC X or JC Y. Or CCA X or CCA Y. There's no exact which and which or where and where I'll be happier with my life. It's just a way unfulfilling feeling that runs very deep inside. Not enough laughs, not enough tears, not enough fun, not enough fears. (Rhymes! ._.)
Don't you feel this way?
*
By the way, if you read the previous entry about a piece of wet tissue flying into Song Minghan's face... and believed it,
HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA.
How could you believe something that ridiculous?!
HA. He posed for that picture larh. ._. That tissue was his, he wet it with his bottle's water, he put it on his face himself. And I took a picture asking him to pose. And we talked about me posting it on my blog and bluff you dumb people.
Ohmy! I feel so accomplished now! Two years in NJ worth it!
...
Okay byebye.
10:11:00 AM because I say so
I don't know why, the nearer we get to graduating (hopefully), the emptier I feel. It's like I don't know what I'm going to school for anymore.
But the scary thing is, I know if I had another chance, to re-choose back at the age of 16, I'll still choose this 'dream school' of bright red tie and Bukit Timah. Even if I already know 961 takes about 6 eons to arrive, even if I'm already familiar with the dread when I miss a 961, or the barney jams at Kranji when Mas Salamat just went missing. Or even if I already know I will only get to wear the bright red tie once a year. I think I'll still end up in NJ.
Maybe it's because I won't be brave enough to toy with something new and totally unfamiliar.
Or maybe, there are some things about NJ that I won't want to forgo. People, mostly. (Feels weird saying mostly when the quantity isn't really alot. But still, it's mostly. Get it?)
It's not like I feel I'll be happier in JC X or JC Y. Or CCA X or CCA Y. There's no exact which and which or where and where I'll be happier with my life. It's just a way unfulfilling feeling that runs very deep inside. Not enough laughs, not enough tears, not enough fun, not enough fears. (Rhymes! ._.)
Don't you feel this way?
*
By the way, if you read the previous entry about a piece of wet tissue flying into Song Minghan's face... and believed it,
HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA.
How could you believe something that ridiculous?!
HA. He posed for that picture larh. ._. That tissue was his, he wet it with his bottle's water, he put it on his face himself. And I took a picture asking him to pose. And we talked about me posting it on my blog and bluff you dumb people.
Ohmy! I feel so accomplished now! Two years in NJ worth it!
...
Okay byebye.
10:11:00 AM because I say so